dreams

so now that my ribs seem to be fully healed, i'm trying to throw myself head-first into my trials riding.  i can't believe it's almost been a year since i first decided it was something i wanted to try.  i could be so good by now, but i've just pissed away the time.  the avalon competition will be in jan or feb, and i'd like to compete, but i have a long way to go before i can even get on the courses, much less do any good.

i was just out trying to get over a wall and *almost* made it, then my foot slipped off the pedal and cracked my knee.  i had told myself before i went out that i should put on my pads and helmet, but then i decided i would just "take it easy."  i should know better than to ever believe that i take it easy with things like this.  i get out there, try to do a couple easy things, then spot something that makes me think "i bet i could do that"  and there i go, throwing myself at something out of my league.  i used to do the same thing with rock climbing.  it is great for pushing me and causing me to make myself better, but it's really working over my shins and knees... all because i'm too lazy to put on the pads.  *sigh*   you should all (like 3 of you maybe?) scold me if i don't wear my pads next time.

to make matters worse, i keep having dreams where doing these moves is really easy, like its second nature, and then i wake up and the next time i ride i'm instantly reminded how much i suck.  but before i was dreaming about riding i was having dreams about my dad, which are NEVER good dreams, perpetually frustrating, so i guess i'll take the bike dreams.